You CAN get out 

Depression – I’ve been there. 

Post natal depression- been there too. 

Anxiety- yep, I know all about it.

Almost my entire life, I’ve been exposed to the realities of mental illness. I’ve supported and lived with loved ones suffering a range of mental illnesses, including depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Some of them have overcome their illness, some are on their way, some haven’t reached the point of acknowledgement yet, and sadly, I have lost one to suicide.

More importantly though, and the reason why I feel I can speak honestly on the matter, is that I’ve also been the one with mental illness. I’ve been the one who needed patience and support from others while I worked through those struggles myself. I’ve been in that place where I was so low and lacking motivation that I felt as though I’d never come unstuck. I’ve had the manic episodes where I was careless with my own well being, and at the same time, felt so very alone. I know what it’s like to have an anxiety attack and feel as though you you’re genuinely going to die, and no one would be there to help you. I’ve worried over things that were never really happening in reality, and cried so much it made me feel physically sick. I’ve also felt so numb that I couldn’t possibly face the world, let alone socialise. The incessant worrying, the unprecedented thoughts, the sadness, the anger, the numbness, the loneliness, the sporadic highs and lows…I know how it feels firsthand.

But I also know how it feels to overcome it.

If I was given the choice to go back and not experience anxiety and depression, you know what? I wouldn’t. I have learned so much about myself and others, that I am grateful for having lived through it. I am thankful that I am now able to truly empathise with others who experience similar challenges, and as a parent, I am better equipped to support and guide my children with their own mental health. I am grateful for having a much better understanding of life and of who I really am. Nope, I wouldn’t take it back.

Unfortunately you can become so stuck in a depressive state that it can just feel easier to stay there. It feels safe. It feels familiar. Even though part of you knows that you don’t want to be living like that, and that it can be overcome, it just all seems too hard. Loved ones may ask you to get help, or it may even take a big, sometimes painful, ‘wake up call’ (like a relationship breakdown or loss of some kind) for you to finally realise it’s time to reach out and get help.

Thankfully, I didn’t need to reach a catastrophic moment to recognise I needed help; I was just lucky I was open enough to listen to my loved ones, as well as my own heart when they brought it to my awareness. I’m glad I did too, because I was then better prepared and in a much healthier6d0cae2f35046d4c78ea1a448747786d place when it came time to face some of the toughest experiences of my life. If I hadn’t made the effort to begin the healing process when I did, I might very well still be suffering to this day, and would likely be in a much darker place than I was initially.

No matter how deep your depression has gotten; whether you’ve felt this way for a few months or several years, you
can get out. Not only have I done it myself, but I’ve seen others who were in a much darker place than myself do it too. But first, you have to want to get better, and to do that – to be in that mindset in the first place – you have to acknowledge you are depressed.

Among many helpful tools such as reading up on mindfulness techniques, cognitive behaviour therapy, medication, and the support of my psychologist and loved ones, the most important part of my healing was allowing myself to feel, and then, to express those feelings. So, if you’re in a place right now where you’ve been able to take that first courageous step of acknowledging you need help, my suggestion to you is this:

Feeling your emotions 

Allow whatever feelings arise to flow naturally. Whether it’s anger, sadness, disappointment, guilt, jealousy, or even rage, allow yourself to feel it. Don’t keep trying to push those feelings aside because the more you bottle them up, the harder they are to manage when they eventually resurface again (and they will resurface-even if it’s years down the track). It’s much safer and healthier to cry, yell, sob, or throw punches at a punching bag than it is to get to the point where these feelings may come out in other ways (such as violence, self-harm or addiction). 8ae5f3198179e992f7020a77b0e9fab5

As difficult as it is to believe that really feeling these emotions could be helpful, I promise you, it is. They’re obviously not nice feelings to be experiencing, but they are there for a reason, and that reason is to be feltYou will quickly start noticing just how different you feel afterwards; how much lighter you feel, and what a relief it is to have finally let it out.

This is a huge part of the healing process and is called releasing or letting go. Once you’ve been able to do that things will start getting easier. You will have made room in your heart and mind for more positivity to enter.

Expression

Another very helpful thing to do when processing your emotions is to express them in other ways, such as writing or speaking about them with someone you trust. Until you’ve done it, you will not believe just how therapeutic this is. Again, it may bring on tears or feelings of anger or sadness, but being able to express your innermost thoughts in this way gives you a more ‘concrete’ way to further release them through the use of words (eg. on paper, on a computer, or by speaking).

A great way to think of this process is that once you’ve released these feelings by turning them into words, you no longer own them. They are no longer intoxicating your thoughts, your heart, or your mind. This again, leaves a much bigger space for you to start the road to healing.

While suffering from depression or any other mental illness isn’t easy, it can be overcome, and ultimately, will make you that much stronger and wiser as you make your way through it. Life does get easier, the days will be brighter, and you will know again what it’s like to feel joy. This is in no uncertain terms, the absolute truth, and believe me, I know, because I am now in that place. No matter how long you’ve been there, or how deep or dark a place you are in right now, you CAN get out.

“It is only in our darkest hours that we may discover the true strength of the brilliant light within ourselves that can never, ever, be dimmed.” – Doe Zantamata

If you are feeling depressed, or know someone who is, there are many support networks out there, as well as useful information available, with just some of them listed below. If you are ever in a place where you feel like harming yourself or others, please reach out to someone you trust and contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Emergency 000 or 112 from your mobile phone. You can also contact the Crisis Support Chat online.

Beyond Blue  1300 22 4636

Headspace National Youth Mental Health Foundation  1800 650 890

Black Dog Institute Information on symptoms, treatment and prevention of depression and bipolar disorder.

Kids Helpline A free, private and confidential, telephone and online counselling service specifically for young people aged between 5 and 25.  1800 55 1800

MensLine Australia A telephone and online support, information and referral service, helping men to deal with relationship problems in a practical and effective way. 1300 78 99 78

MindSpot Clinic An online and telephone clinic providing free assessment and treatment services for Australian adults with anxiety or depression. 1800 61 44 34

SANE Australia Helpline Information about mental illness, treatments, where to go for support and help carers. 1800 18 7263

Compassion: Why are people so afraid to express it?

Warning: this blog post may offend some people. I am open to hearing your opinion if you so wish and welcome any comments.

Today I have been in debate with people on social media in regards to a couple of news articles that have been posted, and it was quite disheartening that all I received was abuse and angry comments for speaking my mind. 

The news articles were in relation to the following: 

1. Four teenagers who hit a pedestrian, who was a mother of two, while riding monkey bikes illegally. The teenagers fled the scene and were arrested two days later. The woman had her life support switched off today. 

2. An eighteen year old girl didn’t know she was pregnant until the baby started crowning. She put her hand over the baby’s mouth and placed it in a bag under a tree. The baby died.

Now, these are both horrific incidents, and I am by no means condoning the behaviour; nor do I agree with their actions. I also do not believe any of these teenagers are innocent, and I agree that they need to abide by the law. My heart goes out to the family of the woman who has now passed, and all who are affected by it. 

The article about the teenager who gave birth unexpectedly was a well written piece that took into account different aspects of the situation, including the need for baby drop off points and the state that the girl must have been in to react in that manner. I thanked the writer in the comments section for seeing both sides of the story, yet the rest of the comments were directing hate towards the girl, with people basically saying she is a murderer and should be locked up. My personal opinion is that she will have to live with what she did for the rest of her life and that it is punishment enough. 

In regards to the motorbike accident (because it was in fact that-an accident), my comment was simply this: “Bloody hell, they’re just kids”. Well, I got called the devil, amongst other things, and after I elaborated on my comment by talking about how I simply meant that I genuinely felt compassion for all involved (including the teenagers and their families), the comments against me came flooding in very quickly!

Now again, I don’t condone what these boys did, however I am in a headspace where I can appreciate that everyone is human, and in this particular instance, we are talking about children. These boys were aged between 15 and 17, and while they clearly did the wrong thing, they are still children. They have the rest of the their lives ahead of them and their foolish actions a mean they are going to have to live with fact that they killed an innocent mother of two for the rest of their lives. Of course, they are going to have to deal with whatever the courts dish out to them, and I agree, they’ll need to suffer the consequences. That doesn’t mean though that they should just be ‘written off’ as scumbags (as they were called by some) for the remainder of their lives. 

In reading comments posted on both of these articles, all I saw was hate. Not once did I see a comment made by anyone who had taken a moment to consider how this may affect those who caused these incidents or their families, and I guess, I probably shouldn’t have expected to. After all, people have a right to be angry. But whatever happened to compassion? Healing? Education? These are after all, children. They may be teenagers, but they are still children. Children who are supposed to have their whole lives ahead of them. Children who, with the right attitudes and support from people around them still have a chance at living a productive and meaningful life. Children who have made a terrible mistake that has now changed their lives forever.

There were more than likely people who read my comments on those articles and agreed with me, but were too scared to reply, or to even hit the like button for fear of being judged. I wish though, that more people would speak up. Society are too quick to just write people off and simply hate them for what they’ve done, yet if there was a little more compassion and understanding amongst us, perhaps some of these children might actually have a chance at living some kind of ordinary life in future, instead of being labelled ‘a criminal and nothing more’. If that’s all they’re led to believe they are from now on, then of course they’ll live up to that label. 

One of the responses I got from my comment on the motorbike incident was, “would you make the same comment if it was one of your family members? I don’t think so”.

My answer to that is yes. While I would obviously be devastated if it were one of my family members who was hit, I would be equally distressed if it were my son who had made an error in judgement when out with his mates one day and ended up killing someone. I said it in my comments, and I’ll say it again. I genuinely feel compassion for all involved. I may be a minority in feeling this way, but I stand by it. 

Make me a promise, son 

My eldest son is twelve years old and he in his first year of high school this year. While his childhood has been prodominently happy and full of love, he has not been without some tough times either. 

He was a victim of bullying in his later primary school years, and has dealt with his fair share of change from moving house and schools several times. He has experienced some challenges, including adjusting to having his Dad living interstate and only seeing him a couple of times a year, and losing one of the closest men in his life; his great grandfather, when he was eight. He has also experienced the reality of the effects of mental health issues with watching his Mum suffer and overcome anxiety and depression, as well adapting to life with his stepdad who has lived with PTSD and depression for ten years. 

In spite of all of this however, his resilience never ceases to amaze me. He is a sensitive young man who never shys away from expressing his emotions, and I am often in awe of his very kind heart.

So, to all you young men who may be struggling with understanding who you are or why you’ve been faced with challenges so early in life, please know you’re not alone. 

To all you boys who aren’t afraid to show your feelings, good on you! You may get told you’re acting like a ‘girl’ or a ‘sook’, or that you shouldn’t be so emotional; don’t listen to it because that’s rubbish. Emotions are a natural and necessary part of being human. You’re much better off talking about your feelings than bottling them up; that’s how you keep your mind healthy.

Anyway, my hope is that you might take something away from this letter, just as I hope my own son does. 

Make me a promise son; a promise to always be you.

You may have had your tough times throughout life so far, but you are such a strong person already because of your experiences. 

Because you’ve been a victim of bullying, you can put yourself in others’ shoes who might be experiencing the same thing. You can truly empathise with them and support someone in need. You never judge others based on their appearance, race, abilities or sex. You embrace everyone for who they are. This is a beautiful trait to have, ang this makes me extremely proud.

Through your experience of not having your Dad around all the time, while I know it’s been hard, you’ve learnt to truly appreciate the time that you do get to spend with him. You aren’t concerned at all about what he can buy you, the places he could take you, and all the materialistic things; you simply enjoy being with your Dad and the relationship you have with him. This experience has also helped you to form closer and more meaningful relationships with the family members who are close by. I know what it’s like not to have my Dad in my life, as you know, and the fact that you cherish that very special relationship with your father warms my heart.

When Pa passed away, I know it was hard on you, and that you still miss him terribly. You are very lucky however, that you were able to spend eight wonderful years getting to know such a special man, as many children don’t ever get to meet their great grandparents. I know you appreciate having him in your life, even if it wasn’t for a very long time, but always remember just how much he loved you and how he adored his first born great grandchild. Experiencing loss and grief through losing such a close loved one for the first time in your life allowed you to broaden your awareness of what really happens after our physical body dies, and has also helped you to embrace your spirituality.

Living with two parents who have suffered from mental illness hasn’t been easy, I know. Our little family has had our fair share of challenges, to say the least, and I appreciate just how much of an effect it has had on you over the years. Even though at times, this has placed you in a position where things are unfair or upsetting for you, you still manage to have such compassion and understanding, that it overwhelms me. Your patience and resilience is astounding, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for that. I have no doubt that you have learned an entire lifetime of lessons from this, and that you not only support and ground me, your mother, but you’ll likely do the very same for many more people in future (whether you do so intentionally or not).

Let me tell you that we need more young men in the world that are just like you. Men who treat women with the utmost respect and aren’t afraid to show affection. Men who openly talk about their feelings and cry when they feel the need to. Real men who don’t feel the need to be violent towards others in order to let out their feelings, because they can do it so much better with words. That is a true sign of strength. 

You are an amazing young man, and I am truly honoured to be your Mum. Never feel the need to change who you are, or apologise for being yourself, because that’s what makes you so special. Always live your truth and do so with the utmost confidence. I love you and I will always be right there to support you. All I ask of you is one thing:

Make me a promise son; a promise to always be you.

  





I wanna hold your hand

My almost two year old son Nate has quite a few ‘rituals’ and one of them is holding my hand when he’s tired. This has proven to be a bit of a challenge at times, because he simply must hold my hand; regardless of whether it’s during the night when he wakes himself up, or when I’m trying to feed his baby sister at the same time. Needless to say, I’ve become frustrated many, many times, especially in the middle of the night, when it’s near impossible to be holding his hand while also trying to settle his sister to sleep! 

Now, when I say he holds my hand, I don’t mean that he just needs to feel me near; he has to intertwine his little fingers into mine and hold my hand ‘properly’. While it’s absolutely gorgeous, you can imagine what it’s like for me if for some reason, I can’t, and he starts crying; waking everyone in the house up (including his little sister). It then becomes a never ending switch between the two of them, while I try my hardest to soothe them both back to sleep. Not fun!  While this may simply be ‘one of those things’ that toddlers go through, with Nate, I believe there is a lot more to it, and it has to do with the first few weeks of his life. You see, Nate was born five weeks premature and at just ten days old, had open heart surgery to save his life. Not only was he in a humidicrib for the first eight days, but he was then wired up to so many machines, with tubes and all sorts of things hanging out of him, that the only real physical contact I was able to have with him for the first few weeks was to hold his hand. So, I guess you can safely say that it not only means a lot to him, but to me as well.

The more I think about it, even though it’s quite inconvenient and can frustrate me to no end, this is the kind of stuff I’m going to miss one day. Of course, it’s hard to be in that mindset in the middle of the night when all I want is to get a couple of hours block of sleep, but in years to come, when my little man is happily sleeping in his own bed and doesn’t need his Mumma’s hand to hold, I have no doubt I’ll look back and wish that he’d want to do it one more time.

How many jobs do I really have? – A day in the life of a stay at home Mum who works from home

How many jobs do I have? Hmm…let’s see.

My paid work that I do from home is  that I co-run not one, but two businesses with my sister in law. A spiritual healing business (psychic tarot and medium readings, reiki healing, teaching psychic development and tarot), and a publishing company (writing and publishing both our own books, as well as others’ work). That’s my paid work, and while it is most certainly real work, it’s still not seen as being real by some due to the nature of it.

Now, to my unpaid work-the work so many people unfortunately still see as being ‘not a real job’. Here we go- here’s my list of my ‘jobs’ off the top of my head (which, mind you, I do 24 hours a day):

Parent, counsellor, teacher, mediator, cook, cleaner, housekeeper, early childhood educator (I actually do have several years experience and qualifications as both an educator and centre director, so this is helpful), driver, shopper, nurse…

I’d say that currently I have 10+ jobs.  There are likely some people out there still questioning this, and rolling their eyes saying something like, “yeah right, ok”. Let’s elaborate then, shall we?

Right now I have a heap of work waiting to be done, and clients waiting on a response. My laptop is open on my desk and everything is ready to go- it has been since around 9.00 this morning. There is a pile of washing that needs to be done, but I put it off this morning because I had to make sure my four month old’s bottles were made up before my client arrived for her session at 10.00am. I would have made them up earlier, but I didn’t want to be late dropping my toddler at daycare and my eldest son at school. Once I got home from the drop off, I quickly made up said bottles, did the dishes from the morning’s breakfast, and cleaned up the lounge room which looked like a bomb had hit it (no bomb- just a toddler). No sooner had I finished doing that, my client arrived.

At approximately 12.00pm I sat down to start doing some work, and bubs decided it was time for another change and feed. Teething, mixed with hunger and lack of sleep from earlier in the morning (being woken constantly by her almost two year old brother) meant that a simple bottle and nappy change took longer than expected, and so I ended up spending around an hour on the couch before she fell asleep. In between all of this, I managed to answer some phone calls, pay some bills, and keep a close ear out for noises outside to catch our dog from barking and waking her up. Oh, and I also got to go to the toilet once or twice and grab something to snack on.

Oh wow! It’s already 2.40pm and it’ll be time to go and collect my eldest from school soon. If I’m lucky, I might be able to squeeze in a bit of work before I do that, or maybe I should sit down for five minutes and read one of the many books I have sitting there that I can’t wait to get into. No, wait. The washing. Oh, and that phone call I need to make to the bank. Oops, and I forgot that we’re also out of formula so I must go to the supermarket before I pick up the boys, otherwise I’ll need to drag them all with me (not fun).

OK, so it’s now 4.30pm and I did manage to get around forty minutes of work done (sporadically however, in between re-settling bubs). To me though, that is productive, as it’s more work than I managed to get done yesterday. Bubs is having an extra long sleep, and my eldest son is hanging with friends, so I’ve been able to get a little more done than usual. Yay for me! I even got to hang out that load of washing… must be on a roll. Ah.. I spoke too soon. I can hear that familiar sound of bubs waking up. Time to go for now.

It’s now 10.00pm and I finally have a moment’s peace. But let’s rewind shall we, to earlier in the evening: It’s approximately 5.10pm and I’m standing at the stove, trying my best to concoct some sort of nutritious and tasty dinner with what we have left in the fridge because the grocery shopping needs to be done. I have my toddler screaming at my feet because he wants to ‘help’, bubs is crying because she conveniently wants her bottle, and my teenage son complaining because he is grounded, and therefore, bored. To be honest, part of me zones out at this point, and I do this to save my sanity (and from laying on the floor myself and having a tantrum). I end up picking my toddler up so he can help because it’s easier than tripping over him every five seconds, and so now, I’m cooking one-handed, all the while making sure his little helping hands aren’t getting burnt or cut.

Half an hour later, and dirtying many more dishes than I usually would have, I’m finally able to dish up our dinner. Toddler is screaming again because he wants his now; not in five minutes when it has cooled down enough that he doesn’t burn his tongue. Bubs has decided that she doesn’t want her bottle now- she just wants to play, and so I sit on the floor with my dinner, while entertaining her at the same time. My phone is ringing but I can’t answer it right now (don’t people bloody know it’s dinner time?) Needless to say, I had a cold dinner; what was left of it anyway, after toddler decided that my identical dinner was better to eat than his. That’s ok though- I kinda lost my appetite with bubs having a poo explosion anyway.

Right, into the bathroom we go, and it goes something like this:

“You need to keep the water in the bath…No, Gracie doesn’t want to drink the enormous bucket of water you just threw in her face… Get off her, you’re too heavy…that’s not funny- now Mummy’s saturated!”

I lift bubs out of the bath before she gets smothered by her brother,then call out to teenager: “Brendon can you stand here for a sec while I grab towels? Make sure your brother doesn’t drown.” I’m now even more saturated and have dropped water from one end of the house to the other, and so when I hear toddler screaming, I’m soon told by teenager that he wanted to get out and he of course ran for his life, slipping on the water and whacking his head on the hallway wall. Is it bed time yet?

Ok so it’s only 6.15 and it feels like 9.00, but bed time is at least in sight, PJs are on, and it’s time for our 208th viewing of Frozen. Thank God for Frozen. I manage to get the dishes done while teenager continues to try and bribe me into lifting his grounding early. He follows me, complaining how bored he is while I clean up the food from the floor, wondering if toddler actually got any in his mouth. I have to stop cleaning up because toddler has decided it’s fun to push his sister with so much force in the bouncer that she might get brain damage. Frozen is on, remember? C’mon!

My phone rings again and it’s my teenagers Dad, so I answer it and end up having a forty minute discussion about his behaviour (by the way, this is fun to do with a toddler and baby wanting my undivided attention). So, the cleaning up has to wait til later. 

7.30 and toddler is ready for bed. Usually he would toddle off to bed happily with Daddy at this point, but he is on night shift this week, so it’s all me. So here I am, sitting in our bed (not his, of course) with bubs in my arms having a bottle, and toddler laying next to me having his. I won’t go into details, but trying to get a baby and a toddler to sleep at the same time, without them waking each other up, isn’t fun. It’s even less fun when toddler keeps deciding he wants to get up, or ‘help’ me get bubs to sleep. It’s around 8.30 by the time toddler falls asleep (which I’m pretty happy with, considering), so I sneak out like a ninja with bubs in my arms, praying to God she stays quiet just got a few seconds until I can leave the room. She does… Success!

So, back to where I am now at 10.00pm. After several attempts at getting bubs to sleep in between either the dog or her oldest brother waking her up from being noisy, she finally went to sleep around thirty minutes ago. I’ve spent that last half an hour cleaning up (again) and I even contemplated doing some work, but I don’t want to risk making any noise in case she wakes up- plus, I can’t concentrate because I’m thinking about all the stuff I need to get done tomorrow. I make a quick list so I don’t forget any of it, and get my PJs on and sit down.

I take a few moments to wonder just how I managed to get through the day with my sanity still in tact. I thank the universe for giving me such amazing children and a patient heart and mind. After a few deep breaths, I get that book out that I’ve been dying to keep reading, but then put it down again just as quickly. Nope, I’m too tired, and bubs will be awake in a couple of hours for a feed. Nigh-nighs time for me!

This was an average day for me, aside from hubby being on night shift (usually he’s home to help out during dinner, bath and bed time) but it doesn’t make it any less crazy! There are other things I haven’t mentioned here, such as when the kids are sick, if my teenager has a meltdown, or trying to keep appointments; not to mention those days where I actually do get some work done! 

I dare anyone to tell me that “all I am is a Stay at home Mum” or that I don’t have a real job. While my jobs (plural) bring me oh so much joy and I wouldn’t change them for the world, I work bloody hard every day and night, with rarely any opportunity for any resemblance of a break. So, next time you hear anyone mumble similar words, perhaps ask them if they’ve experienced it for themselves. Until anyone has had firsthand experience of being a stay at home parent, they have no idea what it’s really like. In my opinion, anyone who thinks parenting full time is a ‘breeze’ or that it’s ‘not real work’ needs a healthy dose of STFU (look it up if you don’t know what I’m getting at). And, for those of us full time parents who also work from home, I don’t know about you, but these judgemental, ignorant fools can kiss my arse! We work harder and much longer hours then anyone else, and our main job is unpaid. Enough said.

A letter to my Soul Sista

For those of you who aren’t aware, I met my Soul Sista Jess through her marrying my little brother, and we both now co-run Soul Sistas Healing & Guidance– a beautiful spiritual community on Facebook. Our common interests and life experiences drew us together to commence this journey of spiritual enlightenment side by side.


Dear Jess, 

It has now been a few years since we began this journey together, but it feels like so many more, and that’s because we both know that we’ve been on this journey for so, so much longer throughout our past lives. The connection that we have with one another is like no other friendship I’ve had before, and you are the sister I never had. 

We understand each other, and I am very grateful for that. Often, I needn’t even say or do anything, yet you know that something is up, or I’m in need of a listening ear from someone who really understands me. I love that we can be completely honest with each other with absolutely no judgement, but only support and love. We can talk for hours and it feels like minutes; something I can do with very few people in my life.

What you may not know Jess, is that while you may be younger than me, I look up to you. You exude the calmness and rationality I need when things seem chaotic. You tell me the truth when I can’t seem to see it for myself. When I’m not feeling myself, all I need to do is have a chat or a visit with you to remind me who I am. 

Jess, I just wanted to share this with you to let you know that I appreciate you. Your strength, your courageous yet kind nature, your generosity, your honesty, your sense of humour, your spirit, and your friendship. You are my Soul Sista, and I love you. I can’t wait to see what the rest of our journey together in this life brings!

Lots of love,

Christie xx

Connecting with Spirit: It’s all about trust 

Everyone has the ability to connect with Spirit- everyone. We all come from the same place, so why wouldn’t we all be able to?
Unfortunately there are some psychics or readers out there who would have you believe that only certain individuals are born with this gift, but it is simply not true. People that preach that they are born with it and that no one else can learn to connect with Spirit, or are not the ‘real deal’ are sadly mistaken. Yes, you are born with it; everyone is, and it’s not a matter of learning to connect with Spirit, but rather, remembering how.

It’s actually quite surprising that it would even be suggested by anyone that only a select few people are able to have this connection- especially by someone who is providing these types of services to others. In saying that this is a gift that can’t be accessed by all, it would imply that some people are more worthy of others, or that spiritual connection is a rare gift that only certain individuals are granted access to. Hardly sounds fair, does it? Anyone who has been able to remember how to have this connection should be encouraging as many people as they can to do the same, not glorifying it as some gift that only they are special enough to have. So please, if you are ever told anything along these lines (especially by a psychic or similar), please just ignore them, because they are likely not very informed on the matter.

Having said my piece on that, now let’s get back to the fact that each and every person not only has the ability to connect with Spirit, but are connected and always have been. So, let’s elaborate on the term Spirit. Connecting with Spirit encompasses so many more things than you may even realise. I’m talking about any and every entity that is what we refer to as Spirit, including our loved ones who have passed, loved ones and members of our Soul Group from this lifetime and past lives (including those from incarnations on other planets), Angels and Archangels, Ascended Masters, Spirit and Animal Guides, God and more. Spirit is not just limited to our loved ones who have finished this lifetime on earth, but so, so much more.

So, you might be wondering now, “just how do I do this?” The simple answer is, it’s all about trust. You would have already been receiving messages from Spirit, but perhaps aren’t recognising them, or thinking that these things are just part of your imagination. We each have different ways of receiving messages from Spirit; similar to the way that each person learns in a different way. For example, some people learn best through hands on experience; others find it more useful to read a book. It doesn’t mean that these people learn any more or less; just that they have a different way of soaking up the knowledge. The same goes for Spirit connection, with the only difference being that you’re not learning to connect, you’re remembering how to make sense of your connection (because remember: you’re already connected). You just need to figure out the best way to do this that feels most comfortable with you.

Some common ways that you might be receiving messages from Spirit (and perhaps don’t even realise you’re getting them):

  • Synchronicities (such as seeing number sequences or things just happening at the right time)
  • Physical signs such as coming across feathers, coins, or familiar scents
  • Hearing a song on the radio or TV that reminds you of a loved one or gets you thinking about something
  • Seeing ‘movies’ or images in your mind
  • Hearing thoughts, words or names in your mind
  • Sensing that Spirit is around you (a sudden change in temperature or getting the shivers)
  • Seeing orbs or flashes of light out of the corner of your eye
  • Ringing in your ears
  • Electrical equipment or lights ‘playing up’
  • A sudden urge to write or create something that’s seemingly out of nowhere
  • Dreams

These are just some signs that Spirit is connecting with you. How many of these have you disregarded as ‘coincidence’ or your ‘imagination’? If you knew that all or most of these occurrences were Spirit communicating with you, would you think or feel differently about it?

spirituality Let us remember also that it’s not just messages you receive from Spirit. They hear you too- your requests for assistance or guidance, your prayers, gratitude, and love. You may also be receiving healing, strength or courage at a time when you need it most. The list is endless really, but what’s important to remember is that whatever it is you need, Spirit are there to support you. You might not receive what you need at the time you expect, or it may come in a different way, but rest assured, things will always occur at the right time, and with your highest good in mind.

So, always remember this: you are, always have been, and always will be connected to Spirit. Whether or not you choose to pay attention to and acknowledge this connection is completely up to you, but it will always be there regardless. If you choose to be consciously aware of this connection, the most important thing you can do is to trust. Trust that the signs and messages you’re receiving are real, and have faith in the fact that you are very much supported on your journey. Once you’re able to truly trust in this connection, everything else comes naturally.

To find out more, please feel free to visit Soul Sistas Healing